My Biggest Regret

Posted on by Mary

I have a feeling that most people have preconceived notions about what others “biggest regrets” are.  Or at least I do.  

Yeah I know…don’t go there…it’s fault I know!  So I decided that I was going to go through a list of what was basically a set of interview questions.  I decided that in this new year I would try my hand at some new writing exercises that is sure to grow my writing ability and let you my readers get to know me better.

So here it goes, my biggest regret might surprise you……

My biggest regret isn’t persuing my desires and talents as a kids.  As a kid and into my teenage years, my heart ached with the desire to paint, draw, create and write.  I was what you might call a closet artist and writer.  I journaled voraciously .   I loved every single English Composition class I ever took….minus that one in college that another  classmate claimed “was  the best ethics class he ever took”. 

I especially loved (and still do) creative writing!  One of my favorite pieces I enjoyed writing in high school was a piece in which we had to pick a person from some point in the past and explain to that person something that existed now that didn’t exist then.  It was hard but I loved that Challenge and that is kind of why I chose to answer some of  questions over the coming years.

So what made me be a closet artist/writer, you might ask?  

1 thing and 1 thing only.  Fear!  

Everywhere I went I was heavily criticized. After a Lincoln -Douglass Debate in my high school communications class I was asked to be on our school’s Forensics team (no not dead bodies people) public speaking!  But I was told I couldn’t.  It wasn’t until I met the guy that I now call hubby.  He began encouraging me in these things.  He was the first AND ONLY (until I started this blog) that has ever read any of my writing.  Outside of my teachers growing up, only my eyes read my papers.  Same for college.  It’s amazing what a little water and some sunshine can do for a flower.     Without that type of encouragement I would not have this blog.  Without that type of encouragement a book would not be possible.  His opinion has never been that I am wasting my time but that I am becoming who God created me to be.  He truly wants to foster that in me.  I am happiest when I am doing the very things God has created me and gifted me to do!

In all amazement, I sit here writing this.  I never would have thought that 15 years ago I would be writing for ALL the world to see.  I have been asked my multiple people to write a book……and I will EVENTUALLY!   I hope to have a mostly completed manuscript by the end of the year.  There it is….I’m proclaiming it……I’m a WRITER.  I am  writing a book.   

I have conquered my fear and now I am moving on!

Dear Weary Mom….They Grow Up Far Too Fast!

Posted on by Mary

Oh goodness and this is coming from a mom whose 4 kids range in age from 8 down to almost 4…..and just in case you are wondering, no none of them are twins!

But tonight as I stood at my washer and dryer folding my third load of laundry today…..I held in my hands  a few shirts and pairs of pants that have MIRACULOUSLY made it through all three boys.  I can so clearly remember each little monkey as I pulled the shirts over their heads, tickled their tummies and kissed their noses *SIGH*. Sometimes life is so busy, it almost seems to be foggy. One day blends into the next and before you know it the last kid is almost ready to move into 5T!  Oh Boy!

Then the kids (and the adults) have been so busy with school and church and chores and and and…..

THEN A BREAK! Sadly there used to be a day when such a long break overwhelmed me .  But this break…

This Christmas break has been very different.  And I don’t think it’s the kids either.  I know it is me.   It was my attitude.   My attitude  has changed so much over the last year!  God has taught me to love my little sinners for who they are…not who I want them to become.  I have watched my kids  bounce back from some damaging stuff last year, and over the last few weeks realize that my kids are growing leaps and bounds in their faith/reliance on God!   

In some ways they are growing into the very tender hearts I have prayed for, and as they do that they are growing up as well!  Bigger Cloths, more district likes and dislikes,  budding talents and their own very unique personalities.  My kids are as distinct as their favorite colors……my home is a rainbow of differences!  Differences we embrace.  I am so curious as to what God is going to use my rainbow for!   So I encourage you, watch your kids, enjoy your kids, and embrace the rainbow that  is your kids

This Post was inspired by HOPE FOR THE WEARY MOM

Thankful Thursday 1/2/2014

Posted on by Mary

It’s funny…..I have been watching all afternoon as my dear hubby has dismantled my kitchen…..and yet I’m not upset that things aren’t back to normal yet.

For the last two weeks I have watched toys creep hither and yon all over my house and yet…..I’m not aggravated.

I have found writing on my wall……and yet I’m not mad!

In each of those three areas I have great things to be thankful for.  

I’m thankful that my dear hubby is waging war on our mouse population.  I am glad he is adding cabinets, shelves and making my kitchen look even more finished than ever before!   I am glad that my husband has MAJOR skills when it comes to using tools and fixing things.  And I am sooooothankful that he hates mice even more than I do and that is quite a feat!

I am thankful that my kids love to play.  Though play can be messy at times, it shows me my kids are happy and enjoy their home.  I am thankful that I have kids.  After nearly loosing one at birth….and that same one is autistic…..and for nearly two years wondering if we could even have kids, God has taught me to not sweat the small stuff!  This is only for a short time.  Then there will come a time when there are no small children….(though I can’t ever miss stepping on Legos , I will miss seeings dolls, matchbox cars, Star Wars figures and light sabers scattered on the floor!

I am sooooo thankful for the little boy who brings such challenges to my life.  The one who has taught me more patience, more love, and more grace than I ever thought possible.  I am thankful for 3 therapists who work with him, a teacher who could get him to do things no one else could and an aide who cares for him while he is at school!   I am so thankful he is learning to read and to write and though my woodwork and walls are not my first choice for his writing practice it is a daily reminder that he is soaring far higher than we expected him to. 

So yes some walls need some attention but I’m almost afraid to remove it, for I know not what tomorrow brings.  Each days is a precious gift with each of my children and my husband.  I want to remember these successes though they didn’t occur in my desired way.  

The walls may have smudges, the floor may have toys and tiny socks, the windows and glass might have fingerprints for the one hundredth time, but they all serve as reminders that children truly are a blessing from The Lord !

A Room With a View

Posted on by Mary

I know you can’t see it in the picture but we have an incredible view……

We are blessed because almost every room in our house has a pretty cool view, even if there are multiple windows in a room it can be pretty GREAT.  

But we have not always lived in a house with neat views.

One view we had was directly into someone else’s bedroom window……that they didn’t have curtains on….so ours stayed shut….ALWAYS!

My rooms with a view inspire me…or better yet what I can view from those rooms inspire me.  They inspire me to draw closer to my Creator God and to enjoy what God has created for ME…..YES ME!   So many times we sit with curtains drawn because it casts a glare on our TV, or we are too busy to stop and “smell” or at least admire the flowers.  We focus on all the chores that need to be done or….and the list goes on and on and on.   As of right now my living room windows do not have any curtains…they haven’t for nearly 2 years…they will eventually, but at least for now, any time I walk through the living room area and no matter what I am doing I catch a real glimps of what  Godhas painted for me.  It’s a real reminder that even the smallest of details were taken care of…for me!

Do you have a room with a view?  

AND….have you taken the time to enjoy it lately?