Write 31 Days- Day 10- Positive or Negative: That Is the Question!

Posted on by Mary

question

Welcome to Week 2!!

So we already established that we are ALL influences, whether we like it or not!  Now the big question is what’s it going to be? Positive or Negative?

So as I do,  I began to ask myself some questions.  Hard ones.  Ones that will make you curl up and want to crawl under your blankets and make you not want come out because you realize just how short you have fallen short AND how much of a negative influence you really are.

This led to much growth in me.  Today we are gonna explore some of those questions. There is no specific order !

 Question#1- Who is the most important in my life?

Ok so, here is the toughest question of all.  We are just gonna jump in!

Have  you ever heard of JOY clubs?  When I was a kid in our church , they tried out JOY Club.

JOY is an acronymn  for the order in which you should place your priorities of life.

Jesus

Others

Yourself

This very basic principle taught ALL those years aghast stuck with me, usually it shows up when I begin to wader from this principle as the Holy Spirit begins to nudge me to get back in line with this!

So  we need to ask myself:

Is it al about me or about other people and most importantly about Jesus?  In the world we live in today it’s all about what good for me (as an individual).  We have blurred the lines of right and wrong. And what you end up with is a bunch of people who are all thinking they are being a positive influence but in reality they are putting themselves first.  There is no scarce for God or for others.  BUT their is selfishness.

Once upon a time children were taught to respect humanity.  Life.  but instead today violence is glorified.  We spend our days focused on how we look. And if people don’t look in such a way or they pick something that they like and we automatically think it’s our job to save them…’You aren’t gonna wear that are you???”  I don’t know about you but when someone does that to me it immediately makes me think/ feel a couple of different things.

  1. This person doesn’t really like me for me.  They want me to look and behave just like them.
  2. It makes me self doubt.
  3. It makes me feel judged and unaccepted  for something superficial or silly.

Now some would say that I should not let people have such power over me   in reality, we all do this.  we all have opinions and we feel free to share them at any point, because we have the right to.

We are free to our opinion.  However we don’t need to just throw. them out at will.  Pushing our opinions on people, making them feel as though they don’t measure up to our standards is an extremely negative influence and over time you will find that people just plain and simple don’t want to be around you any more.

Now there are times (in love and gentleness) that we need to comfort sin.  but clothing, makeup, hairstyle, hair color, ad even personality or silly things we may like is not a reason  to make your opinions known- if you are dong that- if you are putting your preferences over someone else you are ACTIVELY choosing to be a negative influence(It’s commonly called being a snob)., whether you like it or not.  Choosing to be Friendly, kind,  putting others first is an active choice to be a positive influence.

Question #2 What do I spend my time doing AND thinking about?

Now this one is tough too because this is not just the things you do in front of people but those things we do in the secret.  the places we let our brains go, the feelings deep in our heart!

The principle of Garbage in, garbage out applies here.   Most people will say or I just like______________because it has a fun beat, or it’s a funny TV show, or…..the list goes on and on.  In reality what we are doing by choosing to put that  stuff in, is we are desensitizing ourselves to sin.   We have to be on guard.  We are told many time throughout Scripture to guard our hearts This means we must actively pursue the choice to think on these things:

  • true
  • noble
  • right
  • pure
  • pure
  • admirable
  • excellent
  • praiseworthy

PHILIPPIANS 4:8 NIV

Memorize this passage POST these words anywhere you will see them.  AND then when something pops up that is not what fits these descriptive words you have an ACTIVE CHOICE on what you allow to influence you.

Question #3 Can I be defined as a person who acts one way when I am one Place and another way when I am somewhere else.

Now I am not talking about roles.  Because there are times when I have to be more strict because of my role that others.  What I’m talking about is when we are with our friends do we compromise and then act like good Christian girls come Sunday morning (Or anytime we are at church)?

The funny thing about this one is that we tend to think that we are being super savvy.  Like no one knows who we really are!   That is util  one of our friends or acquaintances who have seen our secret side says something to someone we know who has only seen the other side.   The thing is they may not even  realize you are different.  That’s just who they know you to be.  They aren’t being malicious, just honest.

God has a way of exposing those things because he knows what kind of damage we are capable of.

So are you known in one place as having a potty mouth, cussing up at storm? And then complaining when someone says something off color at church?

That’s Called Hypocrisy and is an active choice to being a negative influence.  You will become known as two faced, fake  and so on.

If you are choosing to be genuine in your morals and standards NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE WITH that is an active choice to be a positive influence.   and again this has nothing to do with role change.

Whatever our  roles are  there are some things that we should exemplify no matter what.

  1. unconditional love
  2. grace
  3. mercy
  4. stand for truth

Question #4 Are you building up or tearing down?

Remember that verse about the condition of your heart being revealed through your speech?

What is the purpose behind the words you speak?

Here’s a quick little verse study in what it means to build up

Ephesians 4:12for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ;

Ephesians 4:16

from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.

2 Corinthians 10:8

For even if I boast somewhat further about our authority, which the Lord gave for building you up and not for destroying you, I will not be put to shame,

2 Corinthians 13:10

For this reason I am writing these things while absent, so that when present I need not use severity, in accordance with the authority which the Lord gave me for building up and not for tearing down.

1 Corinthians 3:10According to the grace of God which was given to me, like a wise master builder I laid a foundation, and another is building on it. But each man must be careful how he builds on it.

Romans 14:19So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another.

1 Corinthians 14:12So also you, since you are zealous of spiritual gifts, seek to abound for the edification of the church.

1 Thessalonians 5:11Therefore encourage one another and build up one another, just as you also are doing.

Romans 15:2Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification.

2 Corinthians 12:19All this time you have been thinking that we are defending ourselves to you. Actually, it is in the sight of God that we have been speaking in Christ; and all for your upbuilding, beloved.

Ephesians 4:29Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.

1 Corinthians 14:26What is the outcome then, brethren? When you assemble, each one has a psalm, has a teaching, has a revelation, has a tongue, has an interpretation Let all things be done for edification.

Acts 20:32“And now I commend you to God and to the word of His grace, which is able to build you up and to give you the inheritance among all those who are sanctified.

1 Corinthians 8:1Now concerning things sacrificed to idols, we know that we all have knowledge Knowledge makes arrogant, but love edifies.

1 Corinthians 14:4One who speaks in a tongue edifies himself; but one who prophesies edifies the church.

1 Corinthians 14:3But one who prophesies speaks to men for edification and exhortation and consolation.

1 Corinthians 14:5Now I wish that you all spoke in tongues, but even more that you would prophesy; and greater is one who prophesies than one who speaks in tongues, unless he interprets, so that the church may receive edifying.

Colossians 2:7having been firmly rooted and now being built up in Him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude.

1 Corinthians 14:17For you are giving thanks well enough, but the other person is not edified.

1 Corinthians 10:23All things are lawful, but not all things are profitable All things are lawful, but not all things edify.

That is a ton of verses based on building each other up!!   We all to often want to Fix  people but in doing this we are really tearing them down.  It’s not our job to fix. It’s his/. We need to speak truth in love and even may need to address sin.

Question #5 Are you quick to take offense?

Offense AKA angry!  OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!

Yeah- and are willing to let people know it.

There’s the whole speech thing again.  and the whole “focused on me” thing.  Why do we get offended?  Usually because something has been done to us or said to us.  Then we let bitterness build.  we obsess over it until it comes spilling out.

The Bible tells us  to:

19 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, James 1:19 NIV

This is SUPER hard.  Especially when we feel attacked.   Here are some tricks I have learned:

  1. Consider the other person.  Was it an honest mistake?   What were the circumstances?
  2. Ask questions.  This is how it came across, Did you mean it like this?   Try t be understanding in this .  Don’t seek to be  angry, seek to gain understanding.
  3. Do NOT take to the internet. Do  not post anything, do not  confront or ask questions in texts. Talk with the person face to face or on the phone so you can at least hear tones.  Because when typing it is normal to read into tones that may not be accurate and then we are doubly angry because we have misunderstood something that was really not the case.
  4. PRAY and ask God to show you what is true.
  5. Rehearse Philippians 4:8 over and over again.

 Question #6 Who are you spending your time with?

Because let’s be honest the people who we spend the most time with we start behaving like!!!  Look at any school, team, kid’s ministry, kids who hang out, adults who we spend the most time with.   it’s called peer pressure or PEER INFLUENCE!

A few years ago I hung out with a person who was super critical. And guess what…..without me even realizing I was slowly becoming that person.  I was becoming a critical person.   If things didn’t happen the way that person thought, they would let people know it or gossip about the person.

One day I looked around me and realized I felt pretty alone AND THEN I realized that person had been doing the same to me.   This person has gossiped about me.    As I began to separate myself I realized just who I had become, and it was not what I liked at all.   And I knew God wasn’t pleased either.  It’s not my job to be critical of people or circumstances.  I’m called to love and build up .

All Wrapped Up

Entitlement- we become so wrapped up in ourselves and our opinions and our desires, and our pain, and our hurt, and what we know, and that becomes all that matters.

We bulldoze people, Butt in where we don’t belong- though we have convinced ourselves that we do have a right to be there.

We don’t have those rights.  THOSE RIGHTS  we gave over to Jesus when we gave our lives to him.

When we choose to give our rights over to him we are actively making the choice to be a positive influence.

Let’s Chat: So what’s is going to be, Positive or Negative?  and which one of these questions was the most convicting?

For me there are two:

The first is the Slow to take offense.  We so often get hurt and it’s easy to let it build up and let the pain begin to affect me.  Taking this steps above have really helped me to grow in my walk with God because bitterness and anger are one of the biggest  dividers of relationships.

And the second is  who am I focused on?  It becomes an almost mindless thing to slip into worry about myself. Protecting me.  Taking care of me. Me Time, My space, My kids, My home….MY MY MY.   When I start hearing myself say I, me or my a lot I know that my focus is way off!

Want to read the rest of the posts in the series?  Check them out HERE

 

 

Write 31 Days- Day 9- Esther’s Influential Attribute: Action

Posted on by Mary

Action

LIGHTS CAMERA ACTION

We have idea just how long it took for all of this to go down.  BUT clearly Esther had to put the plan into Action if  Haman’s evil plan was going to stop!

 A person of influence moves  forward, even if it’s baby steps.  

They speak up 

Esther 4:12-14 NIV

12 When Esther’s words were reported to Mordecai, 13 he sent back this answer: “Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. 14 For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?”

Esther had purpose, a very specific purpose.  BUT HAVING PURPOSE is nothing if you don’t ACT on that purpose!

They embrace their circumstances and move forward.

They act on their words.  It’s not enough to just say something we can say all day that we want to be positive influences but if we keep making choices including NOT to move forward  we are really a negative influence.

Being  a Active Influence is NOT comfortable!

The opposite of this powerful action of influence  is being comfortable. ,This person is satisfied with where they are.  They don’t want to get outside their comfort zone.  They don’t want to be  “PUT OUT”. They are completely at home in the pew doing what they have always done.  “New” is not in their vocabulary. 

Just like a boat in still water cannot be turned we cannot be turned in the direction God wants to send us if we are  just standing there waiting for something amazing to happen.  We have to pursue a relationship with Jesus.  we have to be willing to step out in faith.  Even if it seems completely Crazy.

Now I will say that sometimes God will pick us up and move us.  THIS IS A VERY PAINFUL PROCESS!

An that’s where We come full circle.  If we are WILLING to have FAITH,  live in a TRANSPARENT fashion, with  PERSISTENCE, and a CRAZY love to live life for Jesus, the Action part comes Naturally!

And that wraps up the first week (and two Days) of the writing Challenge!

Let’s Chat: Which of these Attributes is the hardest for you?  For me it’s persistence.  I must confess that I tend to give up WAY to easily!

What’s Coming Up

Starting Tomorrow we will kick off the second week of The Power of Your Influence.  This next week we will be discussing  more in depth the choices we have to be either a positive or negative influence.

You can check out all the writers HERE

And if you missed any of  of my other posts in this series you can click HERE

Write 31 DaysDay 8- Esther’s Influential Attribute -CRAZY

Posted on by Mary

Crazy

Have you heard Steve Curtis  Chapman’s Song Something Crazy?  Here’s the link to check it out on Youtube  and you can find the Lyrics copied below- THIS is the kind of CRAZY I’m talking about !

“Something Crazy”

He’s got a Bible and a megaphone standing on the corner
And everybody’s saying he’s crazy
Well does he really think anybody wants to hear what he has to say
He’s not screaming anybody in fact it’s as if
It’s a love story that he’s trying to tell them

And he knows it may look a little strange
But he just smiles and says “that’s okay”
Cause you know sometimes love makes you act that way

And it’s crazy when love gets a hold of you
And it’s crazy things that love will make you do
And it’s crazy but it’s true
You really don’t know love at all
Until it’s making you do
Something crazy

I know a lady in Uganda and forty kids call her Momma
And everybody thought it was crazy
She used to drive a beemer, but I’ve never seen her
Any happier than she is now
I’ve met them all around the world, they’re the boys and girls
Filled up with the love of the Father

And they know it may seem a little strange
But they just smile and says “that’s alright”
Cause love puts everything in a different light

And it’s crazy when love gets a hold of you
And it’s crazy things that love will make you do
And it’s crazy but it’s true
You really don’t know love at all
Until it’s making you do
Something crazy

Something crazy
Crazy
Crazy when love gets a hold of you
Crazy, crazy
Crazy thing that love will make you do

Well, some might say it’s a crazy thing
To believe in a man who would say he came
From heaven down to earth because of love

But I just smile and say “that’s okay”
Cause you know sometimes love makes you act that way

And it’s crazy when love gets a hold of you
And it’s crazy things that love will make you do
And it’s crazy but it’s true
You really don’t know love at all
Until it’s making you do

Crazy when love gets a hold of you
And it’s crazy things that love will make you do
And it’s crazy but it’s true
You really don’t know love at all
Until it’s making you do
Something crazy

(Lyrics found at AZ Lyrics

My Crazy Story

When I was 19 I wason a plane headed for a country that persecutes Christians.

Everyone thought I was crazy. Maybe I was.(Ok I am-it’s an undeniable fact but that’s ok I’m completely comfortable with that)!

Then when I returned home 10 days later I headed off to Bible college.  Through my time there. I got a lot f “you gotta be  crazy”.  comments.    a couple were before each of 3 or  4 trips to NYC for street witnessing.  One of which was  7 months after 9/11.  We went to ground zero which was still a mess.  The images, noises and smells will be forever etched in my brain.  It was one of the single most hopeless experiences of my life.  Watching as people waited in hopes that their family member was still alive.   The wailing in mourning of loved ones.   The unnatural  nose burning smell that came from the smoke (not steam) from the manhole covers and sewer drains.   The digging of the vehicles as they creeped along the rubble trying to clean out the massive destruction.  and what felt like the miles and miles of memorial wall leading to Ground Zero..  This single moment – more than any other – helped me to understand the dire need our world is in – for their desperate need for HOPE- the HOPE I have In me – Hope that is a person!  THAT IS CRAZY!  And that is why we do what we do!

Getting married the same day we graduated.  Yep that qualifies us as CRAZY BUT we didn’t do it for ourselves, we did it for other people.   mostly our dad’s who both work weekends, and we were trying to eliminate the time they would need to take off.

When we had more than 2 kids we were told  we were crazy.  When we had 3 kids in 3 years we were told we were crazy BUT ya know what?  Those four kids are some of the most amazing people I know. Hubby and I were talking just yesterday about how special they are   I have never met four kids who love so deeply, EVERY SINGLE PERSON THEY MEET!  We have watched as our oldest who is 13  now but mourned the loss of people from  the time he was 4.  Always thinking about the people they left behind.   He also seeks justice for those who have been hurt deeply.  He has such moral standards that he seeks to have a marriage that is morally sound AT THIRTEEN! Yeah he has his flaws  BUT his heart !   Most people would say WOW that’s Crazy! And it is.

Our daughter is 12 and she is one of the most patient and sweet spirited kids I know.  She can help out with almost any child she comes in contact with and cares deeply.  She too is also flawed.  but she is 12  and very reliable and trust worthy.  She cares for children and animals.  she has a hunger for learning.

And the two younger boys.:

One has such radical unconditional love!  He might struggle with social cues and norms due to his autism BUT he will always be willing to give you a hug and tell you  You’re beautiful.

and the other is the most hardworking and determined 8 year old I have ever  Met.  He laments from time to time not knowing what he is good at BUT I can tell you this kid is gonna kill it when he gets older.  He has some challenges now with a learning problem BUT he is a fighter- literally ! Yep He’s got a temper BUT our greatest struggle oftentimes become our greatest  gift.

So Yeah I guess I’m 100% crazy AND I wouldn’t change a minute of it.  Outside of my salvation and Hubby these four crazies are the greatest blessing this mama could have ever asked for.  Parenting is hard.  Stuff kids deal with today is awful.   But those who have truly gotten to know our kids REALLY know what kind of blessing they are.  But those who think they know our kids but have never taken the time to get to know them and their hearts, they tend to be super critical.  The funny thing is OUR kids know it.  They know who really love them.  And we didn’t;t say a word.

I’m glad that we didn’t;t listen to the negative voices around us telling us how to live our lives.  I’m so grateful we followed God’s leading whether it looked crazy or not!

Being involved in many ministries.   Im not gonna list it all but a couple of times a year I get asked Are you Crazy?  MOSTLY BY MYSELF- and the answer is ABSOLUTELY!!!

I’m In GREAT Crazy Company!

If you look at history we look at people like Edison, Einstein, The Wright brothers,  Corrie Ten Boom’s family, JESUS, the disciples Peter, Paul, Ruth, Rehab (I could seriously keep going) just to name a few. I’m gonna go out on a limb and say that almost every single person in Scripture were Crazy by their culture’s Standards- and they lived out their faith ANYWAY!

Even Esther was CRAZY

Esther told Mordecai in Esther 4:8-11; 15-17 that it would be crazy for her to go before the king because EVERYONE in EVERY province knows that if you go before the king you will die.  In a sense she saying are you nuts? Why are you asking me to do this? Everyone knows what happens when you do that!

Then after Mordecai gives his response of “well if you don’t, somebody else will and your gonna die anyway,”

She responds back If i die, I die.-That’s  CRAZY!

Safe and Sound

The opposite of Crazy is Safe.  We want to do everything that will keep us safe.  Safe socially, physically, financially and even emotionally.  We build walls and we protect ourselves from being hurt or ruin.

Peter when he denied Christ three times was out of a fear for his safety..  He didn’t want to be put on trial, publicly humiliated and possibly die.

Im gonna be honest here.  I have struggled with a few books as of late.  They are books that either I have read on my own or our Ladies Bible Study have done. 

Now while I think that both books have some great points and areas of  sound advice I saw something in myself that goes against one  my core beliefs.   That Core belief is that when I became a Christian and I gave my life to Jesus that it no longer was my own.   It is His to do with as He pleases- My home is His- Our Home is His.  My craft Stuff IS HIS!.   It is the principle of dying to self!  My life is not my own.   This has radically changed the way we do life in our home.

When I became a believer I gave my entire life over to God It is not my own.   I have handed it over to him.  And it is His to do with as HE sees fit not me.   And I’m not saying that you should not read either one of these books but they do have potential to create a negative influence factor in your life.  So I’m gonna share my struggles with both of these books.

 The Best Yes- There are many Positives to this book!  And the first time I worked through this book I asked some REALLY hard questions about the things I was doing and God posted out something that was not my best yes- Gardening.  I was doing because that is what all “good and frugal wife and mom’s do”. BUT I hate to garden and I don’t have the time to do it justice!!  I was driving myself and my poor hubby insane. We often times put these ideals on ourselves (an sometimes on others).  And if you take the 5 areas Lysa talks about in the Best Yes  and question your ideals looking at deep at the choices you are making FANTASTIC that is what she means by it BUT I found myself busing these principles to build walls- putting myself (AND GOD) in a box-  It became an area of control.  I found myself beginning to seek to control my circumstances and protect myself from those around me who have hurt me.  THAT IS NOT WHAT LYSA IS SAYING!

The second book is Boundaries by Dr Henry Cloud. Now it’s the same basic thing.  I was using the principles in this book to build walls Protecting myself.

And then I heard a song:  I mean I already knew it!! BUT I really HEARD IT.

LIVE WITH ABANDON by the Newsboys

Here’s the YouTube Link

Here a couple of stand out lines from the song

  1. Chasing after this world makes me tired
    Praisin’ my own name leaves me dry
  2. I wanna live with abandon
    Give You all that I am
    Every part of my heart, Jesus
    I place in Your hands
    I wanna live with abandon
  3. I’ll drop everything to follow You
    It’s only Your hands I hold onto
  4. I’m not looking back
    I’m done with that
    Wanna give You all I have

EVERY PART- OUCH

My time

My enery

My Money

my sanity

EVERY SINGLE PART

We think it’s our job to protect ourselves BUT IT”S NOT.  Sometimes it’s when we get hurt that the most beautiful parts of us show through.   Like a refiner’s fire  (yeah now I’m dating myself!). Gold or any precious metals has to go through painful things in order to become the most pure form of itself Because that fire burns off the impurities.  If we protect ourselves from the hard stuff and we build walls- God’s gonna break free and use somebody else- Just like Mordecai told Esther!  By building protective walls you have rendered yourself useless.

By The Way our Ladies Bible Study is currently working through LET. IT. GO. and it’s all about releasing the control we have (or so desperately want). Im breaking down those walls of control!

How about You?

let’s Chat?  What is something that You have done that peole have looked at you and thought you were crazy and you chose to follow God anyway?

OR

What is God asking you to do and you are thinking NO WAY LORD THAT”S CRAZY!!!!!

Write 31 Days- Day7: Esther’s Influential Attribute : Persistence

Posted on by Mary

Persistence

The Power Of Persistence

Another way Esther influenced her world was by being persistent.  She didn’t give up.  She said she was going to do it and she stuck with it, even when plans changed.  So what was she Persistent in?  She had to add a second banquet because God had a plan to make King Xerxes remember some important details about the man Mordecai who saved King Xerxes’ life. We don’t know why exactly she didn’t spill her guts at the first banquet.  There is a lot of speculation BUT for whatever reason we know that God used it for HIS good!!

Other Biblical Examples of Persistence

Moses didn’t think he could go to Pharaoh.  He felt he wasn’t able to speak well enough for such a task and yet God equipped Moses to go before Pharaoh 14 times throughout the beginning of the book of Exodus.  

How about Ruth- the Moabite daughter-in-law of Naomi?  She  along with Orpah and Naomi lost  their husbands.  When Naomi decided to leave  Moab the girls decided to go back to Israel with her.  At one point Naomi urges the girls to go back to their families, stating that she had nothing to offer them and really had nothing to offer them.   Orpah heeded Naomi’s instructions but Ruth  told Naomi That she would not leave her and that her Naomi) people  would become her (Ruth) people and that her (Naomi) God would become her(Ruth) God.  She had no idea what she was getting into.  I’m sure Naomi told her how the Israelites felt about foreigners.   And yet THAT was not her concern.  She wanted to care for  Naomi.   She worked so hard in the fields to provide  for their little family.  And yet God took that persistence and blesses Ruth greatly.   So much so that Ruth will be in the line of David and eventually Jesus.

Perhaps the Most Persistent Man in American History

This person lost 8 elections  in various state and local positions (he didn’t win one single election),

he had two failed businesses,

Lost numerous loved ones including his wife.

He suffered a nervous breakdown ……..all before we called him PRESIDENT Abraham Lincoln.

I find this story inspiring because by the worlds standards he WAS a failure.  BUT he was so persistent  that just by being so persistent makes him an inspiration.  That He wasn’t willing to give up and throw in the towel.   He fought through all of the negative and became a success! And he revolutionized the United States!

Abraham Lincoln like Esther had been persistent, and they were both called “for such a time as this”.   Their Persistence paid off!

The  Command to be Persistent- To Persevere

Another word for Persistence in the Bible is PERSEVERANCE!  To  Persevere  means to be steadfast in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success!

Hmmm sounds a lot like both Abraham Lincoln AND Esther AND a HUGE amount of people scattered throughout Scripture!!

Check out these verses that relay our need for perseverance in our everyday  lives: 

Romans 5 :3-4

3 Not only so, but we] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope.

James 1:2-5

2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

I Quit….I Give Up….

The opposite of persistence or perseverance is Quitting.

We quit because bad things happen or because things aren’t working out the way we envision them or in the time frame in which we want to accomplish  goals. 

 Many times Christians will tack on it’s God’s will to quit. The problem starts though when they first say it was God’s will or God has told them to do something and then all of a sudden they say God told them He doesn’t want to do that anymore.   If God had called or told us to do something then we really need to be persistent and persevere through all the hard stuff that comes with serving God! If we don’t it leads to a whole lot of troubles.  

 We are promised in  John 16:33, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.  In this world  you WILL have trouble. BUT take heart , I have overcome the world.”  AND YES that means in dealing with other believers.  At some point we as Christians forget that we as Christians are still human and we let each other down. No one is perfect.  GASP NOT EVEN OURSELVES.  I’n guessing that you have hurt your fair share of people too.  Just as I have.  I try my hardest to make things right, this is where grace comes in.  At this point this is where I begin to hear echos in my own head saying but you have no idea how much I have been hurt.  You have no idea how much people have hurt me and then come all the stories flowing out like bitter flood waters that have been stuffed deep down within their souls.  I deal with that same stuff.  Because I have been hurt deeply.  And then I remember one thing and it puts it into perspective: Jesus died for everyone including those who crucified HIM.  Realistically if one person in this world would be justified  in holding a grudge it would be Jesus.  He was perfect, sinless and He was made the fool and died a humiliating death. The ultimate hurt and betrayal.  AND HE FORGAVE THEM AND ME!!!   I need to be persistent and persevere despite all the hurt.  

Other times it’s a test from God to see just how serious we are to follow where He has called us.  He wants us to trust him fo HIS purposes  NOT our own.  He wants to know that we are dedicated to HIS ways, despite our ideals and preconceived ideas of how things SHOULD go!

And when that happens oftentimes a person with influence in looked  as CRAZY.

Write 31 Days-Day 6- Esther’s Influential Attribute: Transparency

Posted on by Mary

Transparency

The Powerful Influence of Transparency.

One of our most powerful influences is Transparency.  So many times we put on a front of “fine.”   But when we share our struggles we help other people around us who are also struggling to see that:

1 It’s OK to struggle.

2 That they aren’t alone.

Esther 4:3

3 In every province to which the edict and order of the king came, there was great mourning among the Jews, with fasting, weeping and wailing. Many lay in sackcloth and ashes.

Sackcloth and Ashes were a visible sign of mourning and sadness. It was a way that the people showed that they were is deep distress.  It was a way of communicating with out saying a word.   They were being honest about where they were in life.  Something had happened, something very hard.  There are moments in the Bible where it talks about people being in sackcloth and ashes for a year.  This is a very vivid picture of just how long this mourning process can take.    And in this Chapter of Esther Mordecai was mourning and lamenting before anything even happened.   He was showing just how horrible this impeding massacre was going to be and the Jewish people in Persia followed suit!

The Command to be Transparent

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

Being transparent doesn’t mean we try to fix people who are hurting or act like we have every answer to every problem. Transparent means sharing our story, and comforting people in their hurt.  For however long it takes.  Grace never runs out or we are all doomed.

I had this Bible College Professor Mr. S. He Drummed into our heads,  that  “you can give what you don’t have”.   And in a sense that is what the verse is telling us.  We receive comfort from God when we go through those hard moments in life so we then can pass on those comforts to those who are struggling around us.    Notice how we aren’t told to tell them:

  • how to get better
  • to fix their problems
  • tell them to get over it or move on
  • to pretend like we have all the answers.

So the big question is, “HAVE YOU ALLOWED YOURSELF TO BE COMFORTED BY GOD?”  But I know that for many of us we would say yes but the reality is that we want things to be fixed.  Immediately.  In our time.  In our way.   we May rely on God’s comfort for a time but when things don’t happen in our time or to our liking we say “ok what can I do to change my circumstances”.

Protecting Ourselves with Walls

The opposite of transparent is Hiding, because of fear, or our pride, thinking that we need to have it all figured out and all put together.  If we do that then we are in danger of making other people feel that they are failing because of their struggles, like they aren’t good enough, or like they have done something to deserve punishment.  

We start protecting ourselves.  We build walls and Barriers.  God is not a God of walls and barriers, matter of fact he is in the business of tearing them down.  Walls and Barriers are NOT transparent.  They are meant to keep people out.  To keep our hearts hidden and protected from being hurt.

Being transparent or real about where  we are at and the struggles we are going through helps us comfort others.  Even Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane was transparent when He told His disciples that He was anxious and in great distress.  He asked them to keep watch and to pray for and with Him.  Did they?  NOPE.  They could not comfort Jesus in his great distress because they had not experienced that kind os struggle.  They didn’t understand, so they slept and Jesus struggled with God.  THAT is the very reason why Christ had to die.  That is why He is called the Comforter.

Lessons From My Own life

  1. My eyes- because of having a visual impairment, I am very much aware of those with special needs and whatever it is that they may need.   Whereas other people who aren’t familiar may not have any awareness at all that there is a need to be met.  It’s not their fault and they aren’t being mean but when I see a mom in a store struggling with a child who is in an all out fit I tend not t judge her for her parenting, but instead I send a warm smile in her direction. Saying “yep I get it, parenting is hard stuff”. I’m not called to judge but I am called to share the comfort I have received from God.
  2. And the second thing that really has impacted. our lives is an event that happened four years ago.   It opened my heart to a whole new realm of ministry and it has impacted it greatly.   You can read about that here.  and since the time God has done some amazing things and we have had a chance to  help others maneuver through these sticky muddy swampy waters of the same circumstances.  He have been able to give hope to those who are hurting because we let God comfort us through it.  Yes we tried to help things along and struggled when things didn’t happen like everyone told us it would OR should.
  3. and then there is working at the Pregnancy Center.  And as a volunteer I can teach 2 different mentoring classes.  I can teach Expectant Moms, because as the saying goes, “Been there done that.”  the Center has a policy that if You haven’t been pregnant you can’t teach that Class.  Same with Happy parenting.   I have 4 kiddos.  AND I have custody of them.   Now I have not been able to teach this class for people who have teens because until this year I have never parented a teen.  However if someone comes in seeking mentoring and they have a child with special needs I am their go to girl because I have a son with Autism and I can share hope with them!

If I let God use those hard things in my life to comfort others (not fix or solve) God will use us.   We have to be willing and have faith that he will use those hard circumstances for HIS glory NOT ours.