Anxiety- Negative Influence Trait #3

Posted on by Mary
Anxiety

Good morning friends! Today’s Negative Influence Trait is Anxiety but before you all rush to beat me up with your words let me clarify. I am not talking about medical anxiety- there are all sorts of medical and physiological reasons for anxiety. If you have to take meds to help with anxiety there is no shame here! Take them. It is what your body needs.

I have been rather forefront with my journey with anxiety due to severe iron deficiency over the last 10 1/2 months. I know there are a lot of people out there who declare it all a spiritual battle but I can honestly tell you they are wrong. Have I seen anxiety related to spiritual battles? ABSOLUTELY. BUT to say it’s all related is a massive misunderstanding of what causes anxiety.

I’m referring to more a spirit thing.

What I am talking about is more of having an anxious spirit. now you can have medical/ physiological anxiety and NOT have an anxious spirit and You can have anxiety AND have an anxious spirit AND you don’t have to have anxiety to have an anxious spirit. ( Hint : we all have something that can trigger an anxious spirit, no one is exempt.)

AKA a worrywart. (hehe something funny just popped into my head).

A worrywart is a person who is inclined to worry unduly. (Merriam-Webster online dictionary)

But I would say it’s even more than that. Have you ever seen someone who frets. Every little thing is a concern.

A recent Example

We have a son with autism . He is an amazing kiddo and we love him so much. But he has a problem. He is a worrier and last night was a great case in point. We were at our older two kids soccer games. and our two younger kiddos were off playing with their friends.

All of a sudden child #3 (autism) comes to ask about a berry he had just eaten (insert facepalm emoji here). As a young child we dealt with PICA with him but he has long since moved passed that- but everyone in a while….So We had a conversation and asked why he didn’t come ask me first BEFORE he ate it. He only ate one and I made the statement “well you might end up with a stomach ache.” Well that was it. Long story short a younger kid told him they were safe and that led to a whole other conversation.

He came back 3 more times Once with a “berry” in his hands. I showed him a bunch of pictures of possibilities -none looked quite right right. He even brought me leaf (which looked familiar but I couldn’t place it). He went from I don’t want to have a stomach ache to I don’t want to die in 3.2 seconds. So to set his mind at ease I went and checked out the plant.

I chuckled as I entered the little space because I COULD SMELL the aroma and it was VERY familiar. He kept saying they were blueberries BUT blueberry season is long gone. I walked over to the vines leaned in took a big whiff and smiled – Concord grapes!!!!

He said “what’s wrong mom?” expecting the worst and I smiled at him and said you will be just fine. They are grapes! A look of relief passed over his face and we moved on with our evening.

The reality

Now I know that anxiety and obsessiveness is part of an autistic person’s life. It is something that we have to work on and give him strategies to help him cope with these issues, however if we don’t practice them with him he becomes a ball of worry and it takes over his life.

Living in peace takes a lot of the same practices. Maybe not to the same extent but very seriously we can practice the same principles.

What the Bible says

2 Timothy 1;7 says “for God gave us a spirit not of fear, but of power and love and self -control.” (ESV)

So often we create our own spirit of fear and anxiety by living in the “what ifs”

So what happens when the fear and worry creeps in?

Ask yourself these questions!

  • Is it true?
  • Is it Honorable?
  • Is it just?
  • Is it pure?
  • Is it lovely?
  • Is it commendable?
  • Is there any excellence?
  • Anything worthy of Praise?

Sound familiar? It should those are the things Paul says us to center our minds on in Philippians 4:8-9. BUT then we need to follow the command at the end of verse 9. “THEN THINK ON THESE THINGS”

These concepts are talked about in Elizabeth George’s book Loving God with all Your Mind. I read this book nearly 20 years ago and it is still impacting my life today. I still practice it’s principles on a daily basis. I HIGHLY recommend this book!

Another practice

Quite a number of years ago I adopted the Phrase “Not my circus, not my moneys”. During this time I had a bunch of people who were coming to be with petty “concerns” about other people. Nothing that was my business really though it is amazing how much some people think it’s your business because you are the pastor’s wife. I was beginning to feel fretful about the pressure of “taking care of” these concerns. I’m not really sure how I stumbled upon the phrase, but God used it immediately. I began quoting it. and I even had people who who start to bring something inconsequential up and they would look at me and say—-“oh yeah Not your circus not your monkeys” and that would be the end of it.

A guardrail I set in place

Basically if it is inconsequential I don’t get involved. It’s not my place. But I do have to ask myself Is this my circus? Something I am involved in? And then I have to ask Is it my monkey? Something I am responsible for? And then if the answer is YES then I have to ask a separate set of questions- Will this defame God? (Does it go against God’s laws?) Does this matter? Will this hurt someone? (We once had to deal with a complaint that someone wore too much jewelry to church. We had to ask ourselves what would this profit? Who would this hurt? It was our circus BUT it wasn’t our monkey.)

Dealing with overactive brain

As I was dealing with anxiety over the last 10 months one of the things I struggled with most was overactive brain. As I lay in bed at night my heart would be racing (a physiological problem that just doesn’t “go away”) I would become very fearful of what heart racing could mean. My brain would go nuts with the possibilities. I spent many sleepless nights tossing and turning and being fretful. That is until one night I remembered what I did as a kid when I woke up from a bad dream.

Lessons from My Childhood

In Scouts I had learned an alphabet game. You sat in a circle and you kept rhythm snapping and patting your legs. A topic was picked and you started around the circle to the rhythm and if you broke the rhythm by forgetting what letter you were on or drawing a blank you were out. Well you can’t really play the rhythm part by yourself but you could go in alphabetical order.

As a kid I did all sorts of subjects but as I grew older I gan using names from the Bible. I would switch from people, to cities and countries, I would limit to male names or female names or EVERY name I could think of with that letter. More often than not the concentration would tire me out and I would be asleep before the end of the alphabet. HOWEVER this didn’t always happen. On the really bad nights I could make it through the entire alphabet three or four times.

Why it worked

It wasn’t that this game took away the heart racing and the overactive brain. It was that it focused my mind on God- It replaced the anxious thought pattern. I was focusing on what was good rather than the terrifying. So the symptoms of anxiety were still there I was still dealing with them I was just actively choosing to not give into the anxious spirit. In recent months I have added to the game. If the game isn’t working I use Christian songs- mostly songs I learned in Sunday school or verses that I have learned in the last 10 months which I talked about in the “What I Know” blog post.

What Happens when we live with a constantly anxious spirit?

It negative impacts our family and friends and maybe even a ministry. We become so engrossed in what is going on that we lose sight of the people that are close to us. and we begin to seek to have complete control (and so helicopter parents are born) Having anxiety in the medical sense is terrible because there is nothing you can do about it. There is no controlling it. So we seek to control other aspects of our lives. But we can make decisions to focus on things that will refocus our minds. It will be difficult. As the quote goes “anything worth having is worth fighting for.”

We need to remind ourselves that…

God is in complete control…even if my emotions and feelings are telling me otherwise.

When we choose to set aside our fretting and focus on God it replaces the inward focus that anxiousness is rooted in and it helps us to focus on God. It brings peace.

I in no way have every in and out of this figured out. I know what has worked for our family and the varying levels of anxiety we have dealt with over time. I know that focusing on truth most of all has been the biggest turn around.

Now it’s your tun

What makes you have an anxious spirit? What makes you fret? Is it your circumstances? Your family? Your friends? Or is it not your circus or your monkeys? Ask God to make it clear to you what causes your anxious spirit? And make it a priority to work with him on it. It sometimes takes moment by moment prayer. Because let’s be honest ALL of us have something that triggers that fretfulness to kick in…..It’s just a matter of what!

Have you learned any tricks on dealing with this anxious fretful spirit? I would love to hear about them in the comments below! And if you are dealing with anxiety don’t be afraid to seek medical help. Sometimes our bodies need help in all sorts of ways. Mine happened to be getting iron infusions, yours might be something else. We wouldn’t have shame seeking help for a broken leg so don’t have shame in seeking help for anxiety!

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Love-Learning to Love Like Jesus

Posted on by Mary
Love

Welcome to our first Positive Influence Trait- LOVE. The word love is tossed around like a frisbee at a beach. We use it so flippantly that it loses it’s power and meaning. We start off my saying “I love you mommy and/or daddy”. Then we end up saying things like “I love those chips”. We tell our husband/wife “I Love you” then in the same breath say “I love football”. Our children hear “I love you” but then they also hear us say “I love this TV show”. Are these all on the same playing field? Do our relationships deserve the same LOVE as chips, football and TV shows?

What does the Bible say about Love?

The two greatest commandments are Love the Lord your God with all of Your Heart, Soul Mind and Strength and Love your Neighbor as Yourself. (Luke 10,27 NLT

We are to spend every part of ourselves loving God AND THEN we are supposed to love our neighbors like we love ourselves! You know the Golden Rule. Treat others they way you want to be treated.

But what does that look like- are there things that we all want or need ?

I am so glad you asked!!

I Corinthians 13- The Love Chapter

In First Corinthians 13 we see a list of what love is and what love isn’t.

4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

  1. Patient
  2. kind
  3. Not Jealous
  4. Not boastful;
  5. Not Proud
  6. not Rude
  7. Doesn’t demand it’s own way
  8. Not irritable
  9. keeps no record of being wronged
  10. Does not rejoice about being wronged BUT
  11. Rejoices whenever the truth wins out
  12. Never gives up
  13. Never Loses Faith
  14. Is always hopeful
  15. and endures through every circumstance

I want to be loved like that! So therefore I MUST love people like that!

Whew- Did you notice JUST how many fruit of the spirit are listed in the “what Love is and Isn’t” set of verses? Almost all of the Fruit of the sprit can be tied back to one of these traits of love.

BUT MARY….

I can hear it now here it comes I’m gonna hear why all of the circumstances surrounding someone’s life scenario keeps them from these action steps to being loving. I think that one of the craziest excuses I have ever heard was ‘I don’t have to be loving because they are being stupid”.

I cringe because so often that’s how we look at the Bible….We can dismiss it away accornding to our own perceptions in life. We are so self focused that we can say it’s ok for me to treat this person rudely because……and we forget that “Love is not rude”

How we want to be Treated Vs how we treat others

The same goes for all the other traits- but one of the worst is Patience. We want everyone to be patient with us but when we don’t have patience with others it’s not a problem. We feel entitled to their love, their attention, their money their….Goodness you fill in the blank. And feel angry and frustrated and let down when they don’t fulfill that need in our lives and yet rarely do we stop and ask ourselves “this is outside of their character, I wonder what’s going on with them? ” And then ask in patience and kindness. It takes our minds off of us and onto other people. It’s loving other people like we love ourselves and it’s treating others how you want to be treated.

But we are quick to ignore and forget I Corinthians 13:1-3

It Says

If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. 3 If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it;[a] but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.

If we do all the “good things” in this world and we treat people rudely- and we aren’t patient and we aren’t kind, and we areself-serving- than we are just a bunch of clanging symbols….we ARE ANNOYING!

Annoying?

We are just a bunch of senseless chatter when our walk doesn’t match our talk. And people aren’t stupid. They catch on pretty quickly. The person who said they could treat someone rudely because they were “acting stupid”. was such a clanging symbol- They could talk all day about how the shared the gospel with people and how much they prayed and studied God’s word and then they would be rude to people and did things out of selfish ambition. And as soon as the person would start talking about their spirituality you could see the eyes roll. There would be heavy sighs.

The same is true for those like I mentioned yesterday who wear their sins as badges of honor. “I’m not very patient”. “I am just not a merciful person”. And usually they will tack on some form of “and that’s just the way God made me” dismissal. But then they will tell you about how long the spend studying God Word.

And I hear the words from the end of verse 3 echoing in my heart….

I could boast about it;[a] but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.

Why do we have Nothing? Because we haven’t let God’s word CHANGE US.

When we let God Change us with his word that’s when love starts to grow within us. .

Paul issues a strong warning just before the Fruit of the Spirit passage- It says:

13 For you have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love. 14 For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”[c] 15 But if you are always biting and devouring one another, watch out! Beware of destroying one another.

Wow. That’s powerful. Ya know we have kids learn verses in Sunday school and other church programs like Galatians 5:22-23 and I Corinthians 13: 4-7 but what good does that do them if we don’t teach them I Corinthians 13:1-3 and Galatians 55:13-15.

Modeling Love and the Best Model of All

How do kids learn to love? By being loved! How did Jesus teach the concept of unconditional LOVE? By loving people unconditionally. He was all of 1 Corinthians 13- He loved so well and he was not a clanging symbol. He didn’t treat people poorly. He loved the “unlovable (unlovable according to the cultures standards). He met them where they were at not where he thought they should be. He loved prostitutes and tax Collectors. The paralyzed, the sick- with leprousy and the woman with the issue of blood (things that would have caused him to be “unclean” in the culture). He loved people from other cultures (mixed races if you will). All Culturally unheard of practices.

But he set the culture and the religious systems aside. He practiced what he preached. And when a Pharisee came to him with honest questions and sought understanding he didn’t treat him like an idiot- he loved him unconditionally- Jesus loved people to a place of growth and understanding He Loved them to life!

That’s what I want

I don’t know about you but I want to be THAT kind if influencer I want to love people to life! I don’t want to be a clanging symbol. I don’t want to be annoying.

This world is in a constant state of hurt and pain. I want to be the hands feet and voice of Jesus. I want to be the living breathing example of Him. Because that maybe the ONLY way someone will ever be introduced to Jesus. But the ONLY way I can do that is choosing (That’s it- it’s a Choice- To quote an old DC Talk Song– LOVE IS A VERB) to love unconditionally like Jesus did. Love is the post powerful influence you can ever have!

And when we mess up…Because we will

We apologize…not with empty words but with sincere hearts. And how can we demonstrate our Sincerity? With Change! Let God change us into the loving image-bearer of Christ he wants us to be!

Thanks so Much for doing me today ! I have enjoyed being on this Journey with you and if you are new Here introduce Yourself in the comments below! I would love to connect with you!

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Let’s Talk: Struggles

Posted on by Mary
Struggles

Struggles, we all have them. I listed 7 common ones in the image above but let’s be honest we have a whole lot more struggles than those 7 listed. But these 7 we have all dealt with at some point or another or at least most of them.

Struggles- Why can’t we be gracious?

As a pastor’s wife I have seen what struggles can do to people AND what people can do to those who have struggles. It’s easy to sit back and pass judgement on people for the struggles they are facing. There can be any number of reason’s we face struggles And we aren’t going to delve into them. Maybe that’s a post for a later date or maybe not.

If we all have struggles then why do we feel the need to pass judgement for those who share their struggles with us? I think the first one is PRIDE- We think we are better because we can “handle it” better than someone else. We make it is spiritual gift to be able to handle struggles on our own. (AHEM- just an FYI IT isn’t one). I think the #2 reason is we are afraid of being judged for sharing our struggles and I think the third reason plays into the second- we are so insecure about our struggles that we have to pick on people with more visible struggles that our own.

Lat’s put and end to the Masquerade

Casting Crowns has a great song about this very subject it’s called Stained Glass Masquerade.

[Verse 1]
Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today
Feeling so small
Because when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they’ll soon discover
That I don’t belong
So I tuck it all away, like every thing’s okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I’ll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

[Chorus]
Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain?
But if the invitation’s open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

[Verse 2]
Is there anyone who’s been there?
Are there any hands to raise?
Am I the only one who’s traded
In the altar for a stage?
The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart
But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be?
Would your arms be open?
Or would you walk away?
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay?

[Chorus]
Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain?
But if the invitation’s open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

[Chorus]
Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain?
But if the invitation’s open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

[Outro]
Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today
Feeling so small

“With walls around our weakness, And smiles to hide our pain?”

It’s easy when people smile. It makes us feel good. But when people don’t smile we begin to feel uneasy…it makes us uncomfortable. I can’t tell you the number of times I have hugged people in tears on any given Sunday morning because of whatever was going on in their lives at the time. You name it it was cried over…and on those same Sunday’s I have heard or been told “You just need to smile. ”

I’m sorry but no. You can have the joy of Jesus and be broken all at the same time. We as Christians do not need to live a lie. We can AND should share our broken places and grieve them openly. BUT we should not stay there. It may take weeks or months because there are many stages of grief and pain we need to work through. And THAT takes some time.

Our Struggles are our Struggles but they are not our identity.

We are victors not victims. Yes we need to be open about our struggles. BUT they aren’t our identity. Over the next few weeks I will be sharing my journey in learning all about my identity in Christ. This journey has taken my entire life and will continue until the day I die. I have in no way arrived in my full understanding of my identity in Christ. I am learning something new every single day.

Story time

A while back a friend was really struggling with something. This friend posted about it on facebook and I saw a mutual friend write back a snarky reply. It was inappropriate and hurtful or at least I hurt for my friend because I had been walking this journey with this friend for a long time.

Fast forward some months later I found myself dealing with a very similar (not the same just similar ) problem as my friend. I was having sleepless nights due to some pretty sever anxiety. I had only ever experienced anxiety one other time in my life as a young mom when I was given a medication and that is the side effect it had on me. Fast forward 10 years later and I had just gone through some major medical Trauma.

I lay in bed at night every night for weeks heart beating out of my chest…..Head spinning in dizziness, mind going full tilt in all directions and all I could hear echo in my ears- that’s friends rude question on facebook. Their influence, negative as it was , was wreaking havoc on my mental state. I could hear their accusing tone……that snide comment tore right through my heart and guilt set in. I wasn’t well.

The reality of my anxiety

The comment? ” What are you holding onto? ” Now I understand that you would have to know the person who made the statement but the truth its that person is very harsh….and even though I hadn’t heard the person say it I had heard that person a dozen times before ask similar questions in condescending tones.

The reality is I wasn’t holding onto to anything. The reality was I was sick and we didn’t even realize just how sick I was. Part of anxiety is that you basically convince yourself you are dying- my heart was racing super fast and I was short of breath…and the list goes on and on.

My reality was Anemia and Iron deficiency. Which causes high heart rates. It causes shortness of breath. It causes Anxiety. In December I had NO detectable iron levels in my blood. Yep you read that right ! N.O.N.E.

There wasn’t any amount of letting go- bible study or prayer that could chase the anxiety away. I know, I tried. I begged .I pleaded. I repented and forgave And yet the anxiety persisted and the guilt grew.

We need to stop being “happy plastic people Under shiny plastic steeples”

We need to stop trying to fix people to make them look the part. We aren’t God. God wants us to love people in the middle of their messes. He will take care of the rest. And we need to realize that the only way people are going to heal- not be fixed is through Jesus! Shiny plastic people don’t have scars- Christ followers do- Jesus does. Jesus in all of his perfectness still has scars in heaven. Jesus isn’t a shiny plastic person, why should we be. In His darkest hour he asked for his friends (the disciples) to keep watch and pray with Him- He was left alone- they slept!

Let’s stop trying to be something that we aren’t and be who we were created to be How about we take the masks off and share the real us with the rest of the world so they can see that even in the midst of our deepest grief and sorrow that we trust Jesus with the mess. It’s easy to trust Jesus when life is easy peasy. It gets real when we trust Him with the hard stuff.

Let’s Check our influence

Let’s be honest that friend never thought that their words would impact anyone else but our friend writing the post but the reality is this: That one person made a negative impact on every person who read their comment. Because Satan uses those negative people to harm others even though they didn’t know another soul in that comment thread. . It’s a ripple effect I. have been teaching for years! One little pebble can send a ripple through the whole pond. And one little question can ripple through the hearts of those nearby.

If you are struggling please know that you are NOT alone. And if someone has told you that they have never had a struggle they are being untruthful. They aren’t being real with you! No one’s perfect we shouldn’t pretend to be and we shouldn’t expect others to put on a smile to make us more comfortable

Share with me your thoughts in the comments below and know that you, my friends are being prayed for!

This is post #18 in my Choosing Courage 100 Day Writing Project. to catch up on the rest click here

Dear Senior Me -Day 17

Posted on by Mary
Senior

Dear Senior Me landed on my blog post idea list back around 2013-2014. It came to me after I wrote a blog post called “A Letter to my Adolescent Self”

It was a brief letter I wanted to write to tell the past me to avoid certain pitfalls. What to focus on and not be afraid of. I was afraid of a lotto stuff back in my teenage years too. And then I had this fabulous idea. Write to myself about all the things I didn’t want to forget as I got older! At that point I was 33 years old. Today I am 41. 8 years- almost to the day that I hit publish on that letter to me. I read it for the first time in 8 years today and I nearly made myself cry.

Why Dear Senior Me wasn’t written until now

There’s only one answer FEAR. I only know that the things I want to say to myself could potentially sting others and so I chose to ignore it …There were other easier things to write.

There was a verse that started it all too. I posted it this morning on facebook as I was preparing for this post!

Deuteronomy 4:9

The reality is this isn’t about anybody else than the things I want to remember as a senior adult. If it stings I’m sorry. This isn’t about anyone but me and who I want to be at 60-70-80 years old. But if it stings I urge you to take those stings to God .

So without any more procrastination (8 years was long enough don’t you think)…..

Dear Senior Me

Dear Senior Mary,

Wow what a life you have had! It has been a rollercoaster for sure. There have been ups and downs and hairpin turns. AND so much laughter and joy even in the midst of the hardest days. Don’t forget the laughter and don’t forget the hard days.

Don’t lose sight of the fact that you aren’t perfect and that you don’t have all the answers. The Younger generation doesn’t need you to fix them and all their “wrong ideas”. They need to know that you genuinely care about what matters to them. They need to hear your war stories if you will but they also need you to listen- to really hear their hearts struggles. They need to know that you don’t just like to hear yourself talk.

Remember that there is world outside of Hetlerville and a world beyond your comfy home.

Listen to your grandkids music and dance with them. Take the time to learn about them the way that you did with your children. Teach them that it’s ok to play video games every once in awhile but that people are way more important.

Play games and have inside jokes. Keep their favorite movies and snacks on hand so they want to just come and hangout.

Embrace change that fits within the parameters of the gospel. Remember it’s ok to have fun in church.

Don’t focus on all your ailments. Don’t be rude to people about their looks. It’s not your job to commentate about weight or anything else that is different about a person. Mary’s really remember how much you taught your children to be kind…..You ALWAYS need to be living breathing example because you never know who is watching you.

Remember all the struggles you had at being a new parent, about finding out your sweet little boy had autism and all the negativity that came with it Remember those who came along side you and put their arms around you and said I will walk though this storm with you.

Remember to walk up to a teenager and ask them how their week went. Take them out for ice cream and invite them into your home and when you do that remember not to complain about how awful 2050’s are and how great the 1990’s and early 2000’s were.

Remember Titus 2 is about you seeking out the younger women and not that the younger women seeking you out.

Oh Dear Senior Mary remember to love full of grace and mercy. It is what has gotten you this far in life and it is what will get you through these next years. You have made it through so much and God has never left your side- He has even carried you when it was too difficult to make it on your own. You have had many trials and sad moments but remember that joy comes in the morning and you are nearing the greatest joy of all.

Share that joy with everyone. Be grateful for the amazing adventures you had and don’t harbor bitterness and jealousy. What someone else has is meant for them not you. YOU have your own journey that has been so full of blessings.

What? You don’t remember them? You have countless journals stowed away in boxes that are chock full of blessings that you took the time t name one by one. You did that for a reason- to remember! Dig them out! Read Them! Praises Jesus for the work he did in your life.

Oh and one last thing- You aren’t dead yet! No I’m not kidding so still go on adventures. AND take someone with you! One of your kids, grandkids, your HUBBY! or maybe a friend or two. Don’t forget to share your testimony and all that God has given you on your great adventure.

Love always,

Middle-aged Me

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When the Bible Becomes a Textbook- Day 7

Posted on by Mary
Bible

The Bible A Textbook?

It’s a problem that seems to be growing more and more within the church. It’s more prevalent in college’s and seminaries where the Bible really is on the textbook list. I think a Bible was on every class syllabus I had throughout college except for Math class and maybe the two English classes I had.

When the Bible is taught on an academic level we need to be careful to make sure the Bible stays personal. We need to be sure that we realize that the Bible never returns void and that we can learn something each and every time we read it. But it’s not just in college and seminary, this happens in churches too. It happens when believers take in too much spiritual information. We do it in the name of learning but we forget that there is another piece….

Spiritual Gluttony

Are you a “FAT” Christian? There are so many spiritually obese Christians within the church. They sit in their homes and in Bible studies and they talk about how much they have learned and how much time they spend praying or studying God’s word. They can quote and re-quote God’s word . Yes we are commanded to learn and hide God’s word in our hearts.

That’s not the problem. the problem is when we as believers don’t use the knowledge God has given us through his word. And it’s not just what we do with it it is HOW we use it.

3 Areas That point to spiritual obesity

  1. Holding one’s quiet time/ spiritual disciplines over another person. When we think that our spirituality is greater than someone else’s we are elevating ourselves over others. We aren’t to think ourselves better than other people, no matter how much time we spend in God’s Word.
  2. Using scripture to beat people up. Misuse of scripture and hurting others also shows a lack of maturity in faith. I’m not saying we shouldn’t speak truth but oftentimes we forget the second part of that verse. We need to speak the truth IN LOVE. Not with the proverbial biblical baseball bat.
  3. A lack of spiritual growth. I once heard someone say “I’m not a very merciful person.” It was this person’s excuse to behave poorly and mistreat people. We shouldn’t wear our sins and faults as a badge of honor (more on this in an upcoming blog post). When we know but are not putting the knowledge into practice we show a lack of growth.

Right now our church is doing a study of the book Respectable Sins. And today in church the message was on harshness. And each Sunday, the pastor speaking answers a respectable sin with a Fruit of the spirit. Today the pastor said that fruit is there for us to pick and use as we need and sometimes we just ignore the fruit entirely. Wow!

4 Steps to keep us from Making the Bible. textbook

  1. Remember that the Bible is for us to grow. We need to take the beam out of our own eye before we can take the speck out of another. It’s called humility. Remember that scripture never returns void. We are to learn to become closer to Jesus and grow in his heart and character.
  2. Humility, humility, humility. Have a teachable spirit. Don’t forget that we need to not only take in the information, we also need to apply it to our own lives.
  3. Remember we cannot give what we do not have. You cannot tell someone else how to live if you yourself do not have Joy, Peace, Forbearance, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-Control.
  4. Practice the idea of a personal prayer closet. It doesn’t matter how much time you spend in God’s word just as long as you are devoted to him and have a teachable spirit. If you are reading God’s word for the sake of attacking someone, that isn’t a teachable spirit. Depending on the specific season of our lives we may not have the ability to spend longer in God’s word. Case in point: In December I couldn’t spend as much time in God’s word however, I grew by leaps and bounds because my faith was being stretched in far different ways. My prayer life was different, I learned to rely on God for the most basic of needs. And it taught me a whole new level of reliance on God.

A word about forbearance

Forbearance is a funny word- I have studied it before but I always forget what it means and then I look it up and I say “OHHHHHH”. It also happens to be what I have seen as one of the BIGGEST struggles within the church- patience and tolerance.

Tolerance is more than “you need to be tolerant of me and my ________”

Remember the “we can’t give what we don’t have”. If you cannot be tolerant of the music, or the children in church than you cannot expect to receive tolerance for whatever your preferences are. Did you notice I said preference? Sin should never be tolerated in church.

Confession time

I have struggled with this from time to time. If we are honest with ourselves we all struggle with this. And it’s that honesty that will make the biggest impact in our walk with God. Repent of our sin of mistreating others, misusing God’s word and give over that critical spirit to God and allow Him to change our hearts.

It’s time we realize that being obese Christians fattened up by all of our knowledge is useless. It’s only when we apply God’s word to our lives that it is at it’s most useful state.

How about you? Have you ever struggled with falling into the ‘Bible as a textbook as a trap”? Let me know how you have overcome it in the comments below.