Write 31 DaysDay 8- Esther’s Influential Attribute -CRAZY

When we had more than 2 kids we were told  we were crazy.  When we had 3 kids in 3 years we were told we were crazy BUT ya know what?  Those four kids are some of the most amazing people I know. Hubby and I were talking just yesterday about how special they are   I have never met four kids who love so deeply, EVERY SINGLE PERSON THEY MEET!  We have watched as our oldest who is 13  now but mourned the loss of people from  the time he was 4.  Always thinking about the people they left behind.   He also seeks justice for those who have been hurt deeply.  He has such moral standards that he seeks to have a marriage that is morally sound AT THIRTEEN! Yeah he has his flaws  BUT his heart !   Most people would say WOW that’s Crazy! And it is.

Our daughter is 12 and she is one of the most patient and sweet spirited kids I know.  She can help out with almost any child she comes in contact with and cares deeply.  She too is also flawed.  but she is 12  and very reliable and trust worthy.  She cares for children and animals.  she has a hunger for learning.

And the two younger boys.:

One has such radical unconditional love!  He might struggle with social cues and norms due to his autism BUT he will always be willing to give you a hug and tell you  You’re beautiful.

and the other is the most hardworking and determined 8 year old I have ever  Met.  He laments from time to time not knowing what he is good at BUT I can tell you this kid is gonna kill it when he gets older.  He has some challenges now with a learning problem BUT he is a fighter- literally ! Yep He’s got a temper BUT our greatest struggle oftentimes become our greatest  gift.

So Yeah I guess I’m 100% crazy AND I wouldn’t change a minute of it.  Outside of my salvation and Hubby these four crazies are the greatest blessing this mama could have ever asked for.  Parenting is hard.  Stuff kids deal with today is awful.   But those who have truly gotten to know our kids REALLY know what kind of blessing they are.  But those who think they know our kids but have never taken the time to get to know them and their hearts, they tend to be super critical.  The funny thing is OUR kids know it.  They know who really love them.  And we didn’t;t say a word.

I’m glad that we didn’t;t listen to the negative voices around us telling us how to live our lives.  I’m so grateful we followed God’s leading whether it looked crazy or not!

Being involved in many ministries.   Im not gonna list it all but a couple of times a year I get asked Are you Crazy?  MOSTLY BY MYSELF- and the answer is ABSOLUTELY!!!

I’m In GREAT Crazy Company!

If you look at history we look at people like Edison, Einstein, The Wright brothers,  Corrie Ten Boom’s family, JESUS, the disciples Peter, Paul, Ruth, Rehab (I could seriously keep going) just to name a few. I’m gonna go out on a limb and say that almost every single person in Scripture were Crazy by their culture’s Standards- and they lived out their faith ANYWAY!

Even Esther was CRAZY

Esther told Mordecai in Esther 4:8-11; 15-17 that it would be crazy for her to go before the king because EVERYONE in EVERY province knows that if you go before the king you will die.  In a sense she saying are you nuts? Why are you asking me to do this? Everyone knows what happens when you do that!

Then after Mordecai gives his response of “well if you don’t, somebody else will and your gonna die anyway,”

She responds back If i die, I die.-That’s  CRAZY!

Safe and Sound

The opposite of Crazy is Safe.  We want to do everything that will keep us safe.  Safe socially, physically, financially and even emotionally.  We build walls and we protect ourselves from being hurt or ruin.

Peter when he denied Christ three times was out of a fear for his safety..  He didn’t want to be put on trial, publicly humiliated and possibly die.

Im gonna be honest here.  I have struggled with a few books as of late.  They are books that either I have read on my own or our Ladies Bible Study have done. 

Now while I think that both books have some great points and areas of  sound advice I saw something in myself that goes against one  my core beliefs.   That Core belief is that when I became a Christian and I gave my life to Jesus that it no longer was my own.   It is His to do with as He pleases- My home is His- Our Home is His.  My craft Stuff IS HIS!.   It is the principle of dying to self!  My life is not my own.   This has radically changed the way we do life in our home.

When I became a believer I gave my entire life over to God It is not my own.   I have handed it over to him.  And it is His to do with as HE sees fit not me.   And I’m not saying that you should not read either one of these books but they do have potential to create a negative influence factor in your life.  So I’m gonna share my struggles with both of these books.

 The Best Yes- There are many Positives to this book!  And the first time I worked through this book I asked some REALLY hard questions about the things I was doing and God posted out something that was not my best yes- Gardening.  I was doing because that is what all “good and frugal wife and mom’s do”. BUT I hate to garden and I don’t have the time to do it justice!!  I was driving myself and my poor hubby insane. We often times put these ideals on ourselves (an sometimes on others).  And if you take the 5 areas Lysa talks about in the Best Yes  and question your ideals looking at deep at the choices you are making FANTASTIC that is what she means by it BUT I found myself busing these principles to build walls- putting myself (AND GOD) in a box-  It became an area of control.  I found myself beginning to seek to control my circumstances and protect myself from those around me who have hurt me.  THAT IS NOT WHAT LYSA IS SAYING!

The second book is Boundaries by Dr Henry Cloud. Now it’s the same basic thing.  I was using the principles in this book to build walls Protecting myself.

And then I heard a song:  I mean I already knew it!! BUT I really HEARD IT.

LIVE WITH ABANDON by the Newsboys

Here’s the YouTube Link

Here a couple of stand out lines from the song

1. Chasing after this world makes me tired
   Praisin’ my own name leaves me dry
2. I wanna live with abandon
   Give You all that I am
   Every part of my heart, Jesus
   I place in Your hands
   I wanna live with abandon
3. I’ll drop everything to follow You
   It’s only Your hands I hold onto
4. I’m not looking back
   I’m done with that
   Wanna give You all I have

EVERY PART- OUCH

My time

My enery

My Money

my sanity

EVERY SINGLE PART

We think it’s our job to protect ourselves BUT IT”S NOT.  Sometimes it’s when we get hurt that the most beautiful parts of us show through.   Like a refiner’s fire  (yeah now I’m dating myself!). Gold or any precious metals has to go through painful things in order to become the most pure form of itself Because that fire burns off the impurities.  If we protect ourselves from the hard stuff and we build walls- God’s gonna break free and use somebody else- Just like Mordecai told Esther!  By building protective walls you have rendered yourself useless.

By The Way our Ladies Bible Study is currently working through LET. IT. GO. and it’s all about releasing the control we have (or so desperately want). Im breaking down those walls of control!

How about You?

let’s Chat?  What is something that You have done that peole have looked at you and thought you were crazy and you chose to follow God anyway?

OR

What is God asking you to do and you are thinking NO WAY LORD THAT”S CRAZY!!!!!