Book Review :Boundaries ByDr. Henry Cloud &Dr. John Townsend

Boundaries

( writer’s note:  if you are looking for a comparison of the two boundaries books and how they are similar/ different I’m sorry this is NOT the blog post for you.  I hav not read the previous editions so I cannot fully compare other than to basically say what you can already see on the cover….”Updated and expanded for the digital age”

Chapter 1- (Don’t Worry I’m not going to go chapter by chapter-  but seriously we NEED to discuss this one in a little more depth).  Chpter 1 is a day in the Boundaeryless life.  It follows Sherrie around in all the ins and outs of her CRAZY life.  Sherrie can’t say NO.  Sherrie is a doormat for anyone and everyone can walk on.  She exemplifies what most people struggle with.    This book then proceeds to take you through some of the most logically written, helpful material.  Chapter 1 Hits you hard with the reality  that we all have Sherrie within us..  At various points in each of our lives we all struggle with our inner Sherrie.  WE CAN ALL IDENTIFY!

The first section of this book focuses on what boundaries actually are, how they are developed and common myths about boundaries (just to name a few).  The second section deals with boundary conflicts, specifically with family, friends,spouse, children, work digital age and God.    And section 3 deals developing healthy Boundaries focusing on  resistance to boundaries and how to measure success with Boundaries and comes full circle in Chapter 17 with A Day in the Life with Boundaries.  This is where Sherrie has learned how to set boundaries and is a new person because of them. She enjoys life rather than dreading it!

I must confess as I journeyed through this book I had a few favorite chapters.  Chapter 5- the 10 Laws of Boundaries is first-  this chapter for me was pivotal as I began to see boundaries  in a different light.  Really I already use and apply these laws in my life and with our children but this made more sense!

  1. The law of sowing and reaping
  2. The law of responsibility
  3. The law of power
  4. The law of respect
  5. The law of motivation
  6. The law of evaluation
  7. The Law of proactivity
  8. the law of envy
  9. the law of activity
  10. the law of exposure

As I read through these sections I became keenly aware that there are natural laws that play into our everyday lives.  These things impressed me that God has set them in place for a reason and I need to utilize them for all they are worth!

Chapter 13-  Boundaries and Yourself-  ALL I CA SAY IS YIKES!!!  This is one of the most challenging chapters.   We can  set boundaries on others but when it comes to ourselves it’s easy to make excues.  Some of the topics the authors touch on is food, money, time, task completion words, sexuality, and substance abuse.  I can tell you for me task completion and time are my biggest struggles. and  as I have read this book I have a new game plan for change and to get better.

Chapter 16- How to measure success with Boundaries.  I’m a goal setter by nature sohis struck a deep resounding chord with me.  I measure goal every single week.  I evaluate and re-evaluate.  It drives me absolutely batty when someone writes about a process but then you have no way to evaluate  whether or not you are progressing.  THIS CHAPTER. WAS A HUGE PLUS.  The authors give you 11 steps of progression….This is NOT a checklist!   This is a Eans of measurement.  This is huge for me and maybe one of the greatest reasons this book is so incredibly helpful!

It was also incredibly helpful to read chapter 18 as Sherrie has found  joy in life (who wouldn’t love  that!)

So my thoughts:  This book was HARD and CHALLENGING!

and yet it is so helpful.  It helps me, not only in my own personal life BUT it helps me as I mentor women,.  It helps me raise my children, and it helps me grow closer to God.

But I have two concerns: 1). I don’t appreciate books that change  translations of the Bible to fit their purposes.  I get what they are trying to do BUT it confuses people.  We need to be careful not to try to fit Bible passages into what we want to say BUT we need to  take God’s word and write from that.  We call that playing hermeneutical gymnastics with the text.  when we change and bend and mold the Bible to fit what we are trying to say.

2). Is not really complaint but a desire.  I desire that in some these books that they might include some chapters that are helpful for this in full time ministry.  It’s not a downfall to the book just a personal wish I guess.

other than that I must say I really enjoyed the book and give it 4.5 stars out of 5.  You Can check out Boundaries on Amazon by clicking here.

A age thank you to BookLoook Bloggers for the free copy for review. with no expectation of positive review.    It has been a real pleasure working with you for the last few years!  This blog post does not contain any affiliate links!